Well-beingisdefinedas theharmonyofpositivefeelingsandefficientfunctioninginaperson. Well-beingensuresapersonexperiencespositiveemotionssuchascontentment, satisfactionandhappiness.Italsoencouragesthedevelopmentofonespotential. Havingsomesemblanceofcontroloveroneslife,attainasenseofpurpose, andcultivatingpositiverelationshipsareallapartofwellbeing. Helpfulnessisatraitwe greatlyappreciateinothers,henceitonlymakessensethatbeinghelpful makesothersappreciateusaswell.Whilebeinghelpfulhasahostofprosin itsfavourtoencourageyoutoadopttheattitudeofbeinghelpful,anextra bonustoitisthatitalsocountsasself-care.Beinghelpful,asmuchasit helpsthepeopleyouarebeinghelpfultowards,alsohelpsyoubehealthierand contributestoyourallroundwellbeing.Andisthatnottheidealsituation? Asituationwhereyoubenefityourselfbutothersaswell?Itisawin-win situation,thismeanswehavenothingtolosebybeinghelpfultoothers,only togain. Whenyou’reapersonthat islookingforwaystohelpothersandpeoplecanrelyonyoutohelpwhenthey needit,youarelikelytofostermorefriendshipsthanwhenyou’renota particularlykindperson.Whenyouofferhelp,youtendtoreceiveahelping handback,aswellandthisiswhatcreatessuchfriendshipsandbonds.These reasonscontributetoyourwellbeingandmentalandemotionalhealth. Wemayunderstandthe socialandpersonalpositiveimpactsofbeinghelpfultowardsotherswell,but surprisingly(whichisnottoosurprisinghonestly,giventhesymbiotic relationshipourmindandbodyhave)beingkindandhelpfultowardsothersalso hasveryobservablehealthbenefitstoo!Didyouknowbeinghelpfultowards othersactivelyleadstolowerinflammation? Scienceisalwaysfinding moreandmorewaysourmentalhealthaffectsourphysicalhealthandvice versa.So,hereareafewbenefitsobservedbythescienceofbeinghelpful towardsothersthataretriedandtested. Helpfulnessboostsyourimmunesystem. Inflammationoccurswhen yourbodyperceivesa‘threat’toyourbodyanditshealthi.einflammationis theresultofyourbodygoingintodefencemodeatthepossibilityofa pathogenthatmayharmyourbody.Butsometimesinflammationcanhappenwithout avalidcause.Inflammationcontributesinsomewayortheothertoallkinds ofailmentswemayface,includingcancer,obesity,diabetes,migraines,and chronicpain Oxytocin,a neurotransmitteralsodubbedasourbrain’s“feel-goodhormone”,helpsreduce inflammation.Thethingaboutbeinghelpfultowardsothersisthatitmakesus feelgoodaboutourselves,releasingoxytocinthatthenentersourbloodstream andhelpsreduceinflammation.Reduceinflammationmeansyouarelesslikelyto feelthediscomfortcausedbysuchailments. Helpinghelpstheheart. Makingothersfeel understoodandhelpingthemcan“warm”yourheart,yes—buthelpingothershelps theheart,bothmetaphoricallyand literally.Helpingothersalsoaffectstheactualchemicalbalanceand functioningofyourheart. Aswehaveestablished before,beinghelpfultowardsothershelpsreleaseoxytocinwhichinturn reducesinflammation.Inflammationcancongestourbloodvessels,whichcanput pressureonourheartasitisresponsibleforcirculatingblood.Butwhen oxytocinreducesinflammation,itexpandsourbloodvesselswhichmakesit easierforbloodtoflowthroughthatreducesthepressureonourheartas well. Thisiswhyoxytocinis sometimescalledthecardioprotectivehormone. Onceourbodyfiguresout anactivitythattriggersthereleaseofoxytocin,itfilesitawayand remembersitthenexttimetoencouragemoreofit.Thismeanseachsubsequent actofhelpfulnessgetseasierandeasier.Helpfulness,then,isoneaddictive habityoucanlatchonto,andyourheartwillappreciateitasmuchasthe peoplearoundyou! Onasidenote,since helpingothersstrengthensyourheartphysicallyandemotionally,isthatwhy theysaynice,helpfulandcaringpeoplehavereallybighearts? Helpfulnesshelpsyoubettercopewithanxiety. Weallfaceanxietyinthe faceofsocialinteractionatsomelevel,butforpeoplewithsocialanxiety, itcanbedebilitatingtoinitiateinteractionwithsomeone.Andanxietyhasa tendencytobleedintooverthinking,andweendupscrutinizingand overanalysingeverythingwedoinasaidsocialsituation.Learningsocial skillsandlearningtocatchsuchspirallingthoughtshelps,butsometimeswe canbeblindsidedbyouranxietyatthelastmoment,andwemaymomentarily freeze. Anxiety,beitmild nervousnessoramoreseverestateofpanic,isatotallycommonhuman experiencethateveryonefaces.Whilethereareseveralwaystoreduceanxiety inanxiety-inducingscenarios-suchasexercise,meditation,medication prescribedbyyourdoctor/therapist,and/ornaturalremedies,itseemsthat carryingoutactionsofhelpingotherscanbeoneofthesimplestandmost inexpensivewaystokeepouranxietyincheck. Insuchsituationswhere youfeelyouranxietycreepin,tryingtoputyourselfintheotherperson’sshoes mighthelp.Andbeinghelpfulurgesyoutodojustthat,youthinkabouthowto helptheotherperson,andinyourpreoccupationwiththatthought,youare distractedfromoverthinkingaboutyourselfandgettinganxious.Whenyoufall intothehabitofthinkingofothers,youwillalsocontinuetothinkofboth ofyou,redirectingthefocusjustyoutoeveryoneinvolved,whichwillhelp reducesomeoftheanxiety. Anotherwaythatbeing helpfulcanhelpwithsocialanxietyisthatpeoplewillexpresstheir gratitudetoyouandyouwillbereassuredofthefactthattheylikeyou.This willgiveyouconfidence,andyouarealsolesslikelytogetanxiousabout youractionsbecauseyoualreadyknowthatpeoplearemorelikelytolikeyou. Thenexttimeyoustart feelingalittleanxious,tryandlookforopportunitiestohelpothers,which Iassureyouareplenty.Itdoesn’thavetobesomethingelaborate,itcouldas simpleassmilingatsomeoneorcallingafriendtocatchupafteralongtime andcheckinginwiththem.Itcouldalsobeasabstractasvolunteeringor lendingyourtimetoanorganizationthataimstowardsthebettermentofpeople lessprivilegedthanus.Evenasmallgesturecanmakeabigdifferenceto others,aswellasyou. Beinghelpfulhelpsyoubuildarobustsupportsystem. Peopleappreciatekind people,andwhenyouarehelpful,othersfeellikeyouareapersonworthyof beingintheirlife.Peoplewhomayhavebeenstrangersquicklybecomefriends andkindnessisalmostalwaysmetwithkindnessinreturn.Whenyouarea helpfulperson,youarelikelytoattractotherhelpfulpeopleintoyoursocial circleastheywillrelatetoandidentifywithyou,andyouwillfeelthe same.Theybecomeyoursupportsystem.Weallfacechallengesinlifeandhave roughperiods.Havingasupportsystem,agroupofpeoplethatstandbyyouand giveyoumoralsupportandinsomecasesotherwaystosupportyoutoo,these roughpatchesgetsignificantlyeasiertoseethrough.Evenyoureverydaylevels ofstressdropwhenyoufeelsecureintherelationshipsyousharewithpeople. Italsoaffectsyourlife span,asyou’reatagreaterriskofcontractingheartdiseaseifyoulacka strongnetworkofpeopleorasupportsystemfamilyandfriends.Sobeing helpfulhelpsyougainasocialcirclethatisthereforyou,iswillingto shouldertheburdenslifegivesyou,andthisalsopreventsdiseases! Helpfulnessprovidesyouwithasenseofcontrol. Weattributecontrolinour livestotwothings,eitheraninternalsourceofcontrolwhichisthethinking thatweareresponsibleandhavetheabilitytocontrolwhatweexperiencetoa considerableextent,oranexternalsourceofcontrolwherewebelieveother peopleandthingsdeterminehowlifeplaysoutforus.Wefeelmoresecurewhen webelievewehavethepowertochangewhathappenstous,andbeinghelpfulto othershelpsusregainthatsenseofcontrolwhenweseehowactivelytaking initiative(helpingothers)leadstotheresultswewant(makingsomeone’sday better,makingsomeonelikeus)inreal-time. Helpfulnessgivesyouabreak. I’msurewheneveryouhave facedaparticularlydifficultdecisioninlife,orhavehadasituationwhere youreallystruggledtofindasolutiontotheproblemyouwerefacing,you musthavehadsomeoneadviseyoutojust‘notthinkaboutitforawhile.And thatisadvicethatactuallyworks,andnotjustwithdecisionsandchallenges. Abreakfromsomethingnotonlyhelpsuseaseforawhilebutsteppingaway fromsomethingalsogivesusafreshperspectivewhenwecomebacktoit. Whenyouhelpsomeoneyou arefocusedonthetaskitselfandhowtobesthelpthem.Whenyouredirect yourfocusfromyourproblemsandstressestosomeoneelse’ssituation,you forgetaboutyourownissuesforawhile.Andlet’sbehonest,sometimesitis somucheasiertosolessomeoneelse’sproblemscomparedtoourown.Andwhen youcomebacktoyourownproblem,youcomebackwithasenseofself-assurance athavinghelpedsomeoneelsesolvetheirs,whichwillhelpyoupersevereuntil youhavesolvedyours. Helpingfeelsgood. Justasbeinghelpedmakes usfeelbetteratnothavingtoworryaboutwhateverwehavebeenhelpedwith, helpingothersalsomakesusfeelaccomplishedandfeelbetterathavinghada positiveinfluenceinsomeone’slife.Helpfulnessreleasesfeel-goodhormones, aswehavediscussedbefore. Ifyoueverobserveyour mood,youwillrealisethatwhenyoudosomethingniceforsomeoneelse,it improvesyourmoodtoo.Butthisisn’tsomethingthatjusthappensrandomly—it isrootedinthewayyourbrainfunctions.Scientificallymonitoringourbrains hasrevealedthatwhenwehelpsomeonethepleasurecentresofourbrainare activatedi.ehelpingothersdoesmakeyouhappy. Doingthingsthathelp othersalsoboostsyourserotonin,anotherneurotransmitterthatisresponsible forfeelingsofsatisfactionandbyextensionwell-being.Likeexercise,which givesyouarushoftheseneurotransmittersafteranintenseworkoutorsprint akaa“runner’shigh”,actsofhelpfulnessalsoreleaseendorphins,andthough muchlessintensetheyareenoughtomimica“helper’shigh.”Soifyouare feelingdownorlethargic,goandhelpsomeone,nomatterhowsmallthetask is,andyouwillfeelmuchbetter. Sowhatwelearnfromall ofthesepointsisthathavingahelpingnatureonlyhelps. Ithelpsinbothpersonal andsociallife.Ithelpsinsociallifebymakingyoulikeableandhelps projectapositiveimageofyoutoothers.Thisleadstobetterrelationships, avaluablesocialcircle,andinmanywaysalsohelpsyoufurtheryour professionallifeandcareer.Ithelpsyouimproveyourpersonallifeinmany waysaswell,helpsyougrowintoawell-roundedperson,andhelpsyouimprove yourpersonalitybyhelpingyouwithyouranxietyaswellgivingyouthe confidencetobethepersonyouareunapologetically. Ithelpsyoutakecareof yourselfandyourhealth,bothphysicalandmental-emotional.Itimprovesyour physicalhealthbypreventingandreducinginflammationwhichprotectsyoufrom ahostofhealthissuesandalsostrengthensyourheart,whichalsolowersyour bloodpressurelevels.Beinghelpfulalsoensurestheupkeepofyourmentaland emotionalhealthasithelpswithself-esteemissues,alsohelpslowerthe stresslevelsthattendtoshootupthankstothedailyhasslesoflife. Helpingothersisalsoagoodwaytoconnectwithyourselfashelpingothers andassessingother’ssituationsurgesyoutointrospectaswell. The bottomlineis,beinghelpfultoothersisalsoself-careandhelpsothers aroundusleadbetterlivestoo.Thisfulfilling-dual-purposenatureisenough justificationastowhyweshouldtryourbesttobehelpful.
Well-being is defined as
the harmony of positive feelings and efficient functioning in a person.
Well-being ensures a person experiences positive emotions such as contentment,
satisfaction and happiness. It also encourages the development of one's potential.
Having some semblance of control over one's life, attain a sense of purpose,
and cultivating positive relationships are all a part of well being.
Helpfulness is a trait we
greatly appreciate in others, hence it only makes sense that being helpful
makes others appreciate us as well. While being helpful has a host of pros in
its favour to encourage you to adopt the attitude of being helpful, an extra
bonus to it is that it also counts as self-care. Being helpful, as much as it
helps the people you are being helpful towards, also helps you be healthier and
contributes to your all round well being. And is that not the ideal situation?
A situation where you benefit yourself but others as well? It is a win-win
situation, this means we have nothing to lose by being helpful to others, only
to gain.
When you’re a person that
is looking for ways to help others and people can rely on you to help when they
need it, you are likely to foster more friendships than when you’re not a
particularly kind person. When you offer help, you tend to receive a helping
hand back, as well and this is what creates such friendships and bonds. These
reasons contribute to your well being and mental and emotional health.
We may understand the
social and personal positive impacts of being helpful towards others well, but
surprisingly (which is not too surprising honestly, given the symbiotic
relationship our mind and body have) being kind and helpful towards others also
has very observable health benefits too! Did you know being helpful towards
others actively leads to lower inflammation?
Science is always finding
more and more ways our mental health affects our physical health and vice
versa. So, here are a few benefits observed by the science of being helpful
towards others that are tried and tested.
Helpfulness boosts your immune system.
Inflammation occurs when
your body perceives a ‘threat’ to your body and its health i.e inflammation is
the result of your body going into defence mode at the possibility of a
pathogen that may harm your body. But sometimes inflammation can happen without
a valid cause. Inflammation contributes in some way or the other to all kinds
of ailments we may face, including cancer, obesity, diabetes, migraines, and
chronic pain
Oxytocin, a
neurotransmitter also dubbed as our brain’s “feel-good hormone”, helps reduce
inflammation. The thing about being helpful towards others is that it makes us
feel good about ourselves, releasing oxytocin that then enters our bloodstream
and helps reduce inflammation. Reduce inflammation means you are less likely to
feel the discomfort caused by such ailments.
Helping helps the heart.
Making others feel
understood and helping them can “warm” your heart, yes—but helping others helps
the heart, both metaphorically and
literally. Helping others also affects the actual chemical balance and
functioning of your heart.
As we have established
before, being helpful towards others helps release oxytocin which in turn
reduces inflammation. Inflammation can congest our blood vessels, which can put
pressure on our heart as it is responsible for circulating blood. But when
oxytocin reduces inflammation, it expands our blood vessels which makes it
easier for blood to flow through that reduces the pressure on our heart as
well.
This is why oxytocin is
sometimes called the cardioprotective hormone.
Once our body figures out
an activity that triggers the release of oxytocin, it files it away and
remembers it the next time to encourage more of it. This means each subsequent
act of helpfulness gets easier and easier. Helpfulness, then, is one addictive
habit you can latch on to, and your heart will appreciate it as much as the
people around you!
On a side note, since
helping others strengthens your heart physically and emotionally, is that why
they say nice, helpful and caring people have really big hearts?
Helpfulness helps you better cope with anxiety.
We all face anxiety in the
face of social interaction at some level, but for people with social anxiety,
it can be debilitating to initiate interaction with someone. And anxiety has a
tendency to bleed into overthinking, and we end up scrutinizing and
overanalysing everything we do in a said social situation. Learning social
skills and learning to catch such spiralling thoughts helps, but sometimes we
can be blindsided by our anxiety at the last moment, and we may momentarily
freeze.
Anxiety, be it mild
nervousness or a more severe state of panic, is a totally common human
experience that everyone faces. While there are several ways to reduce anxiety
in anxiety-inducing scenarios - such as exercise, meditation, medication
prescribed by your doctor/therapist, and/or natural remedies, it seems that
carrying out actions of helping others can be one of the simplest and most
inexpensive ways to keep our anxiety in check.
In such situations where
you feel your anxiety creep in, trying to put yourself in the other person’s shoes
might help. And being helpful urges you to do just that, you think about how to
help the other person, and in your preoccupation with that thought, you are
distracted from overthinking about yourself and getting anxious. When you fall
into the habit of thinking of others, you will also continue to think of both
of you, redirecting the focus just you to everyone involved, which will help
reduce some of the anxiety.
Another way that being
helpful can help with social anxiety is that people will express their
gratitude to you and you will be reassured of the fact that they like you. This
will give you confidence, and you are also less likely to get anxious about
your actions because you already know that people are more likely to like you.
The next time you start
feeling a little anxious, try and look for opportunities to help others, which
I assure you are plenty. It doesn’t have to be something elaborate, it could as
simple as smiling at someone or calling a friend to catch up after a long time
and checking in with them. It could also be as abstract as volunteering or
lending your time to an organization that aims towards the betterment of people
less privileged than us. Even a small gesture can make a big difference to
others, as well as you.
Being helpful helps you build a robust support system.
People appreciate kind
people, and when you are helpful, others feel like you are a person worthy of
being in their life. People who may have been strangers quickly become friends
and kindness is almost always met with kindness in return. When you are a
helpful person, you are likely to attract other helpful people into your social
circle as they will relate to and identify with you, and you will feel the
same. They become your support system. We all face challenges in life and have
rough periods. Having a support system, a group of people that stand by you and
give you moral support and in some cases other ways to support you too, these
rough patches get significantly easier to see through. Even your everyday levels
of stress drop when you feel secure in the relationships you share with people.
It also affects your life
span, as you’re at a greater risk of contracting heart disease if you lack a
strong network of people or a support system family and friends. So being
helpful helps you gain a social circle that is there for you, is willing to
shoulder the burdens life gives you, and this also prevents diseases!
Helpfulness provides you with a sense of control.
We attribute control in our
lives to two things, either an internal source of control which is the thinking
that we are responsible and have the ability to control what we experience to a
considerable extent, or an external source of control where we believe other
people and things determine how life plays out for us. We feel more secure when
we believe we have the power to change what happens to us, and being helpful to
others helps us regain that sense of control when we see how actively taking
initiative (helping others) leads to the results we want (making someone’s day
better, making someone like us) in real-time.
Helpfulness gives you a break.
I’m sure whenever you have
faced a particularly difficult decision in life, or have had a situation where
you really struggled to find a solution to the problem you were facing, you
must have had someone advise you to just ‘not think about it for a while. And
that is advice that actually works, and not just with decisions and challenges.
A break from something not only helps us ease for a while but stepping away
from something also gives us a fresh perspective when we come back to it.
When you help someone you
are focused on the task itself and how to best help them. When you redirect
your focus from your problems and stresses to someone else’s situation, you
forget about your own issues for a while. And let’s be honest, sometimes it is
so much easier to soles someone else’s problems compared to our own. And when
you come back to your own problem, you come back with a sense of self-assurance
at having helped someone else solve theirs, which will help you persevere until
you have solved yours.
Helping feels good.
Just as being helped makes
us feel better at not having to worry about whatever we have been helped with,
helping others also makes us feel accomplished and feel better at having had a
positive influence in someone’s life. Helpfulness releases feel-good hormones,
as we have discussed before.
If you ever observe your
mood, you will realise that when you do something nice for someone else, it
improves your mood too. But this isn’t something that just happens randomly—it
is rooted in the way your brain functions. Scientifically monitoring our brains
has revealed that when we help someone the pleasure centres of our brain are
activated i.e helping others does make you happy.
Doing things that help
others also boosts your serotonin, another neurotransmitter that is responsible
for feelings of satisfaction and by extension well-being. Like exercise, which
gives you a rush of these neurotransmitters after an intense workout or sprint
aka a “runner’s high”, acts of helpfulness also release endorphins, and though
much less intense they are enough to mimic a “helper’s high.” So if you are
feeling down or lethargic, go and help someone, no matter how small the task
is, and you will feel much better.
So what we learn from all
of these points is that having a helping nature only helps.
It helps in both personal
and social life. It helps in social life by making you likeable and helps
project a positive image of you to others. This leads to better relationships,
a valuable social circle, and in many ways also helps you further your
professional life and career. It helps you improve your personal life in many
ways as well, helps you grow into a well-rounded person, and helps you improve
your personality by helping you with your anxiety as well giving you the
confidence to be the person you are unapologetically.
It helps you take care of
yourself and your health, both physical and mental-emotional. It improves your
physical health by preventing and reducing inflammation which protects you from
a host of health issues and also strengthens your heart, which also lowers your
blood pressure levels. Being helpful also ensures the upkeep of your mental and
emotional health as it helps with self-esteem issues, also helps lower the
stress levels that tend to shoot up thanks to the daily hassles of life.
Helping others is also a good way to connect with yourself as helping others
and assessing other’s situations urges you to introspect as well.
The
bottom line is, being helpful to others is also self-care and helps others
around us lead better lives too. This fulfilling-dual-purpose nature is enough
justification as to why we should try our best to be helpful.
